Borrowed Memoir

For my borrowed memoir, I would really like to touch base on my connection to my grandfather as well as his condition. Growing up without my dad, my grandfather has pretty much stepped up as my fatherly figure. I stick to him like glue. Not too long ago, when my grandfather was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer, he told me his wishes. He wished to be cremated and have his ashes thrown into the ocean. Till this day, I wonder why the ocean? But it all makes sense now. My grandfather loves to go fishing. He owns a boat, which he revamps every month, even during the winter. Fishing something that me and my grandfather always did, even though I hate the smell. I realized that then ocean is where he can breathe, where he can be free. The ocean can take you to many places, and I interpret his need to be in the ocean so he can be free and roam where ever he wants. He is currently undergoing chemo, but it hasn’t been going that well. Me and him are so connected, its almost like I can feel his pain. It brings me to tears every time I think of the idea of him being gone. A quote that I would like to focus on is from Lopate’s reading. He says “An essay needs conflict, just as a short story does. Without conflict, your essay will drift into static mode, repeating your initial observation in a self-satisfied way”. I feel like this can be implemented into my memoir because cancer is a drastic conflict. I would like to incorporate how cancer is not treatable, but I want to gear it more towards his wishes to have is ashes thrown in the ocean and his love for fishing and incorporate miner details of our bond.